Seven Year Bitch
Despite millennia of being consistently mistaken, charlatans and true believers alike continue to predict that the end of the world is just around the corner. The latest entry in the Book Of Inevitable Failure comes from pastor Mark Biltz, of El Shaddai Ministries in Bonney Lake, Wash. Pastor Biltz has determined that a series of lunar eclipses that will appear in 2015 are a likely herald of the long awaited second coming. Why? Because they happen to fall on the same days as his religious festivals.(video)
This prediction has all the classic elements. Regular, predictable astronomical phenomena, reference to vague bible verses, coincidental timing with arbitrarily dated church holidays, current political unrest and enough wishful thinking to kill a yak at 20 paces.
My favorite part of this whole scenario is that Hal Lindsey, crackpot and lifetime member of the failed prophets club, dismisses Biltz's theory as "pure speculation." Talk about the 100% non-reflective surface calling the kettle black.
Someone remind me to send Mr. Biltz a postcard in 2016. I'm sure I'll be way too busy not burning in hell to remember by myself.
2 comments:
Well, that's good planning. Plenty of time for the paperback to be released.
You might want to check out, if you haven't already,
THE DOOMSDAY LIST!
Which also links to:
A Brief History of the Apocalypse.
It seems to me that there is an actual desire on the part of many people to be living at the End Of Everything That Is. I attribute this great interest in the Apocalypse to the same reason people sit through a crappy movie: the desire to See How It All Turns Out.
Sorry, folks, you'll never know.
"Plenty of time for the paperback to be released." Insightful as always.
Thanks for the links. Some interesting reading, although a little disappointing that they don't seem to be updating anymore.
Your "See How It All Turns Out" theory puts me in mind of "The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe." Now I have to go be sad for a moment because Douglas Adams is dead. *sigh*
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