You know what's awful?
  My birthday is tomorrow (10/30). For a moment, I honestly could not remember how old I'm going to be. I had to resort to the actual subtraction. This is a disturbing state of affairs, and I'm not sure if it's attributable to honest absent-mindedness, or some kind of subconscious denial. Either way, it's disconcerting.
  Thought for the day: Cellphones make us stupid. (Before you get all huffy, Huffy McHufferton, I said us. I too have one of these little demon boxes, and it's slowly eroding my cognitive functions.)
  Now, stay with me here. This isn't some kind of rant about how rude it is to sustain a cellphone conversation while conducting a retail transaction. That burns my ass, but that's annoyance. No, I'm talking about a genuinely anxious feeling that overuse of a modern convenience is making me noticeably dumber.
  My basic fear is that having access to otherwise unavailable information is allowing people to cede reasoning in favor of instant communication. Consider this scenario. You go to the video store to rent a romantic comedy for your girlfriend, because you're a sweet guy, who isn't above doing a nice thing to increase your odds of nookie. You get to the store, and the movie that your snugglebunny wants to see has been rented to extinction. What do you do?
  Before the cellphone, you had to make a decision. You had to figure, based on your knowledge of your partner's taste, the type of movie, the recognizable actors, the available titles, and how serious you were about that nookie, what movie to choose as an alternative. At the very least, you had to have planned ahead with a list of acceptable substitutes. Now, in the age of connectedness, you can just call home and ask. Ain't nobody got to do any cogitatin' at all.
  It's the same thing at the grocery store. They don't have regular Oreos? Don't worry! You don't have to sweat, wondering if Double Stuffs are a good go-to cookie. (Yes they are, FYI.) You can just call and ask! Did you get separated from your friends in line for the big music festival? Don't bother trying to figure out where they'd be likely to congregate. Call and ask! Don't surprise your roommate with an after-work snack that might not be her favorite. Call and ask! Don't ever, ever make an independent judgement or decision without checking with someone first. Don't bother to learn anyone's tastes, or try to puzzle out what they'd do in your shoes. Don't take responsibility for anything! CALL AND ASK! *pant pant pant*
  I'm sure this sounds like neo-Luddite nonsense, a badge of my advancing fogey-hood. I'll admit, I'm not exactly riding the edge of the emerging technology curve. Hell, I didn't send my first cellphone text message until last November. But I do use my cellphone, and it often is invaluable for making life more convenient, safer, and a little easier. Still, whenever I find myself calling instead of thinking, I can't help but wonder if I'm surrendering a bit of my mental capacity in favor of the lazy brain's information express.
  Hang on while I call and ask my girlfriend.

I'd like to teach the world to choke.
  But, I'm settling for teaching myself Flash. I spent all god damn day on this little 20 second bit of animation, and I have a newfound respect for the people at Homestarrunner. If you want to check out my freaky little banana/Twinkie guy, speaking in the voice of Michael Mills, click here.