Suburban Panic!

24 November 2002

Dear Little Bald Bastard,
  Complete this sentence:
"Hell is..."
- Personal Virgil
Dear Virgil,
  Well, your classicist might say "other people," to show off how witty and literate they are. Frankly, I think hell is forgetting to shave your head for a few weeks, and subsequently getting your hair caught in every sweater, hood, and hat you wear.
  What? My scalp is sensitive...